I think back to one Sunday, sitting in church, listening to a message preached by my grandfather. It was a special occasion that day, and he chose to preach on the topic of "Hannah", from the Bible. Of course, we know how the story goes. How she prayed and longed so much for a child. And finally, God heard her cry. I can remember sitting there just trying to get through the message, holding back tears. No. I'm nothing like Hannah. Nor is my story. I'm not trying to compare. But, her story does give me hope! Sometimes, the best miracles take time! It's been a few years since that Sunday in church, and NO, I still haven't seen my miracle. But, I have seen God move in different ways in my life! I'm finding it easier to trust Him with the small things, and in time, hopefully, I will see just the miracle I have been seeking! 

My journey so far has been a long and challenging one, filled with countless tests, treatments, and emotions. I’ve undergone extensive lab work, multiple ultrasounds, and several medicated cycles in an effort to manage Anovulatory cycles. Unfortunately, each treatment attempt has ended in disappointment. At one point, I underwent an HSG (Hysterosalpingography) to check for blocked fallopian tubes, which thankfully came back with normal results. Despite this, I’ve reached a crossroads where consulting a Reproductive Endocrinologist is the next logical step. While I’ve considered taking this route, personal reasons have kept me from completing an evaluation with a specialist. Through it all, I continue to hold onto hope and faith. I believe in the possibility of miracles and have entrusted the situation to God. His plans are far greater than mine, and while I don’t always understand the "why" or "when," I’m doing my best to trust in His perfect timing. Even in moments of confusion and doubt, I remind myself that He knows what He is doing.

The TWW... TWW stands for the “two-week wait,” the period after ovulation when a person or couple eagerly waits to find out if they’re pregnant. For many, it can feel like the longest and most nerve-wracking wait!  If you're anything like me, patience during the TWW is not my strong suit. I can't help myself—I start testing as soon as possible, often taking multiple tests over several days, hoping to catch even the faintest early signs of HCG. You’d think after countless negative tests, I’d have learned to wait it out by now. (Thinking maybe God is trying to teach me a lesson in patience!)  That said, my optimism somehow persists. Call me a little crazy, but despite the odds, I keep holding on to hope even when there’s no logical reason to believe things will be different. This time, though, something feels a bit different about this TWW. I’m not symptom-spotting yet (I promise, lol!), but this cycle has brought a few subtle changes that make me feel a little more hopeful than usual.  I know only time will tell, but for now, I’m making the conscious choice to embrace the waiting period with faith. After all, every moment—no matter how uncertain—is an opportunity to grow, hope, and trust the journey.

My TTC (Trying to Conceive) journey began the same year my husband and I got married in 2014. At the time, I was 27, and he was 37. We hadn’t dated for long before realizing we were soulmates – we just knew we were meant to be together. Initially, we hadn’t planned on having children, but the more we talked about it, the more our hearts began to change. We both share a deep love for children, and it felt so right to grow our family. My husband’s bond with my son was one of the things that solidified my belief in him as a wonderful father. He opened his heart and embraced my son as his own, later adopting him. Witnessing his care and love made me certain that he would be an incredible dad. After about a year of trying to conceive without success, I brought up my concerns with my primary doctor. She reassured me that it could take time, but by the second year, I knew deep down that something was wrong. In 2016, I was diagnosed with severe squamous dysplasia (CIN3) and squamous cell carcinoma in situ of the cervix. That journey is a story for another day, but with medical procedures and the healing hand of God, I overcame that challenge. Fast forward to March 2017: I finally saw the word “Pregnant” on a digital test! After countless negative tests, I was overjoyed and filled with hope. However, my excitement was short-lived. At my doctor’s appointment, I was told that my pregnancy test result was faint, and blood work would be needed to check my HCG levels and see if they were doubling. It was the longest, most nerve-wracking weekend, waiting for the doctor’s call. When the call came, it wasn’t the news I had prayed for. My heart shattered. After years of trying and waiting, I thought this was finally my answered prayer. I remember hearing the song *Hills and Valleys* by Tauren Wells on the radio during that time. I cried endlessly, consumed by heartbreak. The only way I made it through those dark weeks was with God’s help. It wasn’t until 2018 that I began advocating for myself and seeking more answers from doctors. Little did I know, my journey was far from over.